Monday, October 29
what to say
all is quiet in the sanchez home. jon is sleeping and has been for forty-five minutes. i got off work about an hour ago and am awake. in rainbows by radiohead just finished another play through making things more quiet, more still. it feels nice. i feel a bit more calm than yesterday when i found a magazine blog by some college friends and began to feel completely inadequate, like i had just wasted the past three years in seminary, the past week at work and my entire degree. i had to remind myself that i was only at part b of my plan and part c is as of yet undetermined. i felt like dignan in "bottle rocket" pointing to the photo of the lawn wranglers. i had to get comfortable early on in college that my career path wouldn't look much like my classmates. in the past three years i've only drifted further away from the magazine mecca that is new york. though, i never wanted to go there. and i never wanted an internship at meredith. so, i suppose i'm doing fine. and though there are dishes stacked in the sink and bits of this and that strewn about the living room the house feels settled, because may will come soon enough and i'll graduate and move out of our apartment and someone will have an idea of what i should do next.
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3 comments:
"Fact is Dignan, that the picture isn't doing it for me right now."
That quote pretty much sums up how I feel at this point. And your prize is being determined and will reach you soon enough.
Hi Friend!
The wonderful world of blogging often leaves me feeling left behind and inadequate. I watch my friends go off to exciting careers or starting their families all while I sit and wait for the next step to come my way. Three cheers for the next step and the mystery that surrounds it! I miss you and our coffee chats.
oh Lynette. we have more in common all the time. I think I knew I wouldn't use my degree quite so literally either. but the question lingers: what? magazines communicate and design organizes and communicates and beautifies... which are transferable concepts to understand, just like making lattes. I say that sarcastically, but I know it's true. I'll use all of this.
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